The sofa and sectional sofa community denies the derogatory rumors linking the nation’s favorite furniture with figures like J.D. Vance.
The couch, like America, didn’t choose to be with the man; he was simply forced to sit in a seat that didn’t belong there.
Enough with your “love seat” and “pull out” jokes, it’s about time you all started treating our sofas like they deserve their full price.
Sure, you can find some for free on the street, but some are worth tens of thousands of dollars. And it’s usually not that easy to get us back to your house.
As we all know, the relationship between a sofa and its owner is sacred. Let’s admit it, you adore us every day. Even at work, you find yourself craving our tender embrace.
Imagine if your couch was the talk of the town like this: Would you want everyone to know about the crumbs we swept underneath us and the spills on top of us that we hid with pillows?
We give you what you need. We are honest. We provide homes for couch surfers and couch potatoes alike. We provide beds for spouses in need. And this is what we get in return?
As many of you have found out recently, we do whatever is asked of us, and we hope that at the very least, you now understand why we sometimes get covered in plastic.
You guys aren’t so innocent yourselves. You guys are backing us up against the wall and muttering curse words under your breath. Before you judge, try stepping into someone else’s living room.
We are couches, not things. We do not exist solely for your profit and pleasure. We are not people featured in the tabloids or on Facebook Marketplace. We are not defined by words like “used” or “stained” or “free if you take them.” We have stories, love, pennies, and your AirPods. We deserve better.
